*This is an excerpt from my new book out now, All In This Together: Stories and Teachings for Loving Each Other and Our World
Dear friends,
Years ago, when His Holiness the Dalai Lama visited Spirit Rock, the air around him seemed to hum with quiet joy. He radiated that rare mix of laughter and humility that turns reverence into something playful and real.
On that visit, he reunited with an old friend—Maha Ghosananda, the Cambodian monk sometimes called “the Gandhi of Cambodia.” The two had not seen each other in years, they immediately fell into connection of delight and friendship.
Then something beautiful happened. As they bowed to one another, each tried to bow lower than the other. Lower and lower they went until their heads touched together. In teaching that week there was laughter, and care, and reverence for all.
True respect, the kind that melts the boundaries between self and other, isn’t stiff or formal. It’s alive, generous, full of joy. When the Dalai Lama bows, he bows to the humanity in everyone—the doorman, the cook, the security guard, the child at the edge of the crowd. He sees beauty in every face.
When he left San Francisco after that visit, he told the hotel staff where he stayed that he wanted to thank them in person. So, on the morning of his departure, a long line of managers, maids, dishwashers, and cooks gathered in the circular driveway. Before stepping into his car, the Dalai Lama slowly walked down the line, touching each hand, looking into each pair of eyes, murmuring words of gratitude.
It didn’t matter whether someone was wearing a suit or a janitor’s uniform—each received the same warmth. Later, several hotel employees said it was one of the most moving experiences of their lives. “He made me feel like I mattered,” one said simply.
That’s the power of presence that honors all beings. The bow becomes a mirror, reflecting the humanity and sacredness that’s already there.
You can practice this anywhere. Try bowing silently in your own quiet way—when you meet someone, when you pick up the phone, when you sit down to eat. Let each small act become a gesture of reverence.
When we live this way, we discover what those two old friends already knew: that respect and love are not separate, and when we inwardly bow to one another, we come to the ground of our shared humanity.
With metta,
Jack
